why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
