I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize