Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
you didnt know i had herpes?
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
