yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
You pole danced in your parka.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize
