Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
