i jhust puked up my retainher.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Randomize
