she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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