I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
