I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Randomize
