Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I CAN MOONWALK!
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Randomize
