listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
