Don't you send me to vm
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
