i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
you told grandpa to call you daddy
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
