If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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