In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
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