maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
