Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
