take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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