pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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