I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
