Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
