hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
