I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize