i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
