Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
