Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
