I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
