8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
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