Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
