let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
