is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
