tell your sister to shave her snatch
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
