I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Randomize