Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
