Don't you send me to vm
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Randomize
