Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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