these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
