the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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