I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
