Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
