just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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