I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Randomize
