i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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