i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
