he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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