I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize