You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
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