Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
