Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
