...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
you have to choose: penises or morals?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I came so hard my ears popped.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
